At a restaurant in Thai

ขอน้ำเปล่าครับ

khǎw náam-bplàao khráp

Could I have some plain water, please?

Male speaker

น้ำเปล่า (náam-bplàao) is specifically plain drinking water. If you say only น้ำ (náam) the server may ask which drink you mean. Want a bottle? Add the classifier: ขอน้ำเปล่าหนึ่งขวดครับ (khǎw náam-bplàao nèung khùuat khráp). ขอ (khǎw) plus any noun plus ครับ is the politest, easiest ordering frame in Thai, you will use it dozens of times a day.

ไม่เผ็ดครับ

mâi phèt khráp

Not spicy, please.

Male speaker

Say it at ordering time, not after the food arrives. Kitchens take ไม่เผ็ด seriously when a foreigner says it, so if you can handle a little heat, ask for เผ็ดน้อย (phèt náwy, just a little spicy) instead: some dishes taste flat with no chili at all. Tone matters here, mâi falls and phèt stays low.

เช็คบิลด้วยครับ

chék-bin dûay khráp

The bill, please.

Male speaker

Yes, it really is the English words 'check bill' borrowed into Thai, and it is what everyone says. Catch the server's eye, raise a hand slightly and say it, no need to walk to the counter. In smaller shops you may hear or use เก็บตังค์ด้วยครับ (gèp dtang dûay khráp), same meaning. ด้วย (dûay) just softens the request.

รับอะไรดีครับ

ráp à-rai dii khráp

What would you like to order?

Male speaker

A HEARING phrase: the server says this the moment you sit down, it means 'what will you have?'. A waitress ends it with คะ instead: รับอะไรดีคะ (ráp à-rai dii khá). Recognise the shape รับอะไร and you know it is your turn to order. Buy thinking time with ขอดูเมนูก่อนครับ (khǎw duu mee-nuu gàwn khráp, let me look at the menu first).

มีเมนูภาษาอังกฤษไหมครับ

mii mee-nuu phaa-sǎa-ang-grìt mǎi khráp

Do you have an English menu?

Male speaker

Ask this before you sit down at a place that looks very local. If the answer is ไม่มีครับ (mâi mii khráp, we don't have one), point at what another table is eating, it works every time. The frame มี (mii) plus ไหม (mǎi) is your all-purpose 'do you have X?', swap in any noun. In fast speech ไหม comes out high, mái.

มีโต๊ะว่างไหมครับ

mii dtó wâang mǎi khráp

Is there a table free?

Male speaker

This is how it usually goes at the door: you ask, they ask how many, you answer with a bare number. ว่าง (wâang) is free or vacant and works for tables, seats and rooms. The reply you get most often is นั่งตรงไหนก็ได้ค่ะ (nâng dtrong nǎi gâw dâi khâ, sit anywhere you like). If there is nothing, เต็มแล้วครับ (dtem láew khráp, we are full). Women say มีโต๊ะว่างไหมคะ (mii dtó wâang mǎi khá).

ขอโต๊ะสองคนครับ

khǎw dtó sǎwng khon khráp

A table for two, please.

Male speaker

Use this when you want to state the size yourself rather than wait to be asked. Swap the number for any group: สามคน (sǎam khon), สี่คน (sìi khon). Add ข้างนอก (khâang nâwk, outside) or ข้างใน (khâang nai, inside) if you want the street and a fan rather than the air-con room. In smarter places the air-con room can carry a service charge the street tables do not, so it is worth checking before you sit. If they are full you hear เต็มแล้วครับ (dtem láew khráp).

ขอโต๊ะสองคนค่ะ

khǎw dtó sǎwng khon khâ

A table for two, please.

Female speaker

Same sentence, female ending. ค่ะ is khâ, falling tone, with a real h after the k. The rule is mechanical: a statement or a request takes ค่ะ, a question takes คะ (khá, high tone), as in โต๊ะว่างไหมคะ (dtó wâang mǎi khá, is a table free?). When you cannot remember, ค่ะ on a statement is always safe. Drill the pair daily: ใช่ค่ะ (châi khâ, yes that is right) against อะไรนะคะ (à-rai ná khá, sorry, what?).

พี่ครับ

phîi khráp

Excuse me (to a member of staff).

Male speaker

Thai has no shout for a waiter, you use a kinship word. พี่ (phîi) is older sibling; น้องครับ (náwng khráp) is for someone clearly younger than you. Guessing upward is safe and guessing downward is not, so use พี่ when unsure, and คุณครับ (khun khráp) in a smart restaurant. The gesture that goes with it: hand up at shoulder height, palm down, fingers together, one short wave. Never snap your fingers and never say เฮ้ย (hóei). Women say พี่คะ (phîi khá).

ขอเมนูหน่อยค่ะ

khǎw mee-nuu nàwy khâ

Could we have the menu, please?

Female speaker

หน่อย (nàwy) is the softener that turns a demand into a request, and it belongs in almost everything you ask for. Many shops have no printed menu at all: the dishes are painted on the wall, or on a laminated sheet clipped up behind you, so look around before you ask twice. ขอดูเมนูหน่อยค่ะ (khǎw duu mee-nuu nàwy khâ) adds see, and buys you a minute to read it. Men say ขอเมนูหน่อยครับ (khǎw mee-nuu nàwy khráp).

ขอสั่งอาหารค่ะ

khǎw sàng aa-hǎan khâ

We would like to order, please.

Female speaker

Say it once the table has decided, or use it to answer the server who is hovering. สั่งเลยได้ไหมคะ (sàng loei dâi mǎi khá, can we order now?) does the same job when nobody has come over. สั่ง (sàng) is the verb to order, and it is the same word for ordering online or by phone. Men say ขอสั่งอาหารครับ (khǎw sàng aa-hǎan khráp). In many small shops you order and pay at the counter as you arrive, so watch what the table before you did.

มีอะไรแนะนำไหมครับ

mii à-rai náe-nam mǎi khráp

Is there anything you would recommend?

Male speaker

The single most useful sentence in a shop whose menu you cannot read. You will usually get a dish name plus อร่อย (à-ràwy, tasty). If the name means nothing to you, follow with เผ็ดมากไหมครับ (phèt mâak mǎi khráp, is it very spicy?) before you commit. In a family shop the honest answer is often whatever the cook makes best, so this question tends to get you the good dish rather than the tourist one.

อันนี้เท่าไหร่คะ

an-níi thâo-rài khá

How much is this one?

Female speaker

Street stalls and market shops often have no prices up. Ask before you order, not after the food is cooked. จานละกี่บาทคะ (jaan lá gìi bàat khá, how much per plate?) is the version for a rice or noodle shop where everything is one price, and ละ (lá) is the per in it. Note the ending: this is a question, so คะ with a high tone, not ค่ะ. Men say อันนี้เท่าไหร่ครับ (an-níi thâo-rài khráp).

ขอผัดกะเพราหมูสองจานครับ

khǎw phàt gà-phrao mǔu sǎwng jaan khráp

Two pork basil stir-fries, please.

Male speaker

The frame is ขอ plus the dish plus the number plus จาน (jaan, plate), and it orders anything. Swap the meat: ไก่ (gài, chicken), หมู (mǔu, pork), กุ้ง (gûng, shrimp). Add ไข่ดาว (khài daao, fried egg) on top and you have the standard lunch. With any stir-fry over rice you may be asked ราดข้าวหรือแยกจานคะ (râat khâao rěu yâek jaan khá, over the rice or on a separate plate?), answered ราดข้าวครับ (râat khâao khráp) or แยกจานครับ (yâek jaan khráp).

ขอข้าวผัดหมูหนึ่งจานค่ะ

khǎw khâao phàt mǔu nèung jaan khâ

One plate of pork fried rice, please.

Female speaker

This is the daily default and it is not shared. Single-plate meals, อาหารจานเดียว (aa-hǎan jaan diao), are ordered one per person at lunch, at street shops and in food courts, which is where a resident eats most meals. หนึ่งจาน is usually said จานนึง (jaan nèung) in speech and both are right. For noodles the classifier changes to ชาม (chaam, bowl): ก๋วยเตี๋ยวหมูหนึ่งชามค่ะ (gǔuay-dtǐao mǔu nèung chaam khâ).

เอาอันนี้ครับ

ao an-níi khráp

I will have this one.

Male speaker

The line that carries you through any shop whose menu you cannot read. Point at the wall, the photo or the tray and say it. เอา (ao) is blunter than ขอ but completely normal for ordering. For two of them, เอาอันนี้สองที่ครับ (ao an-níi sǎwng thîi khráp), where ที่ (thîi) is a portion. Women say เอาอันนี้ค่ะ (ao an-níi khâ). If it has run out you will hear หมดแล้วค่ะ (mòt láew khâ).

เอาเหมือนโต๊ะนั้นค่ะ

ao měuan dtó nán khâ

I will have the same as that table.

Female speaker

Point at food already out on someone else's table. Nobody minds, and it gets you the dish the shop is actually good at rather than the one you can pronounce. เหมือน (měuan) is the same as, นั้น (nán) is that one over there. If the neighbours look up, อร่อยไหมคะ (à-ràwy mǎi khá, is it good?) turns it into a conversation instead of a stare. Men say เอาเหมือนโต๊ะนั้นครับ (ao měuan dtó nán khráp).

ไม่ใส่พริกนะครับ

mâi sài phrík ná khráp

Please do not put chilli in it.

Male speaker

More reliable than เผ็ดน้อย (phèt náwy, only a little spicy), because a little is measured against a Thai baseline and often still arrives hot. ไม่ใส่ (mâi sài) is do not put in and it works for anything: ไม่ใส่ผักชี (mâi sài phàk-chii, no coriander). Say it when you order, not once the wok is going. Ready-made curries sitting in the tray cannot be changed, so there you ask เผ็ดมากไหมครับ (phèt mâak mǎi khráp) instead.

แพ้กุ้งค่ะ

pháe gûng khâ

I am allergic to shrimp.

Female speaker

Add กินไม่ได้เลยค่ะ (gin mâi dâi loei khâ, I cannot eat it at all) when it must be taken seriously. แพ้ (pháe) is allergic and is treated as a medical fact; ไม่ชอบ (mâi châwp, do not like) is treated as negotiable, so use แพ้ for anything that matters. Swap the food: แพ้ถั่ว (pháe thùua, peanut), แพ้อาหารทะเล (pháe aa-hǎan thá-lee, seafood), แพ้นม (pháe nom, dairy). Men say แพ้กุ้งครับ (pháe gûng khráp).

ไม่ใส่น้ำปลานะครับ

mâi sài náam-bplaa ná khráp

Please do not put fish sauce in it.

Male speaker

Fish sauce, oyster sauce and shrimp paste turn up where you would never expect them, including most stir-fried vegetables. The other two are ไม่ใส่น้ำมันหอย (mâi sài náam-man hǎwy, no oyster sauce) and ไม่ใส่กะปิ (mâi sài gà-bpi, no shrimp paste). มังสวิรัติ (mang-sà-wí-rát) is vegetarian; เจ (jee) is the religious version and also excludes garlic and onion, so ask for เจ only if you mean it. No MSG is ไม่ใส่ผงชูรสครับ (mâi sài phǒng-chuu-rót khráp).

ขอน้ำเปล่าเย็นๆครับ

khǎw náam-bplàao yen yen khráp

Could we have some cold plain water?

Male speaker

น้ำเปล่า (náam-bplàao) is plain water as opposed to anything sweet, and doubling เย็น softens it to nicely cold. A bottle is charged for; many shops also put a jug of iced water on the table free. ขอน้ำแข็งเพิ่มครับ (khǎw náam-khǎeng phôem khráp) gets more ice and ขอแก้วเพิ่มครับ (khǎw gâew phôem khráp) another glass, which you need because one large bottle is poured over ice for the whole table.

หวานน้อยค่ะ

wǎan náwy khâ

Less sweet, please.

Female speaker

Every iced coffee, tea and fruit shake is sweetened by default, usually heavily. Say this as you order, attached to the drink: ชาเย็นหวานน้อยค่ะ (chaa yen wǎan náwy khâ, iced tea, less sweet). ไม่ใส่น้ำตาลค่ะ (mâi sài náam-dtaan khâ) is no sugar at all, though condensed milk may still be in there. โอเลี้ยง (oo-líang) is iced black coffee and comes sweet unless you say otherwise. Men say หวานน้อยครับ (wǎan náwy khráp).

ขอจานแบ่งด้วยครับ

khǎw jaan bàeng dûay khráp

Could we have some plates for sharing?

Male speaker

For a sit-down meal with several กับข้าว (gàp-khâao, dishes eaten with rice), the food lands in the middle and everyone takes from it onto their own rice, which is ordered by the portion: ข้าวสวยสองที่ครับ (khâao sǔuay sǎwng thîi khráp, two portions of steamed rice). Single-plate meals are the exception, one plate each. If จานแบ่ง draws a blank, say ขอจานเล็กสองใบครับ (khǎw jaan lék sǎwng bai khráp, two small plates), where ใบ (bai) is the classifier for plates and bowls. Serving spoons are ช้อนกลาง (cháwn glaang).

ขอช้อนส้อมเพิ่มค่ะ

khǎw cháwn-sâwm phôem khâ

Could we have another spoon and fork?

Female speaker

Spoon in the right hand, fork in the left, and the fork pushes food onto the spoon rather than going into your mouth. Chopsticks are for noodles: ขอตะเกียบค่ะ (khǎw dtà-gìap khâ) with a rice dish gets a puzzled look, while ตะเกียบ arrive by themselves with a bowl of noodles. Napkins are the small pink roll on the table and often there is none, so ขอทิชชู่หน่อยค่ะ (khǎw thít-chûu nàwy khâ) is worth having.

ห่อกลับบ้านค่ะ

hàw glàp bâan khâ

Wrap it to take home, please.

Female speaker

ห่อ (hàw) is to wrap. ใส่ถุงค่ะ (sài thǔng khâ) is in a bag and ใส่กล่องค่ะ (sài glàwng khâ) is in a box; soup travels in a bag closed with a rubber band and survives better than it looks. If you brought your own container, hold it out with ใส่กล่องนี้ได้ไหมคะ (sài glàwng níi dâi mǎi khá, can you put it in this box?). ไม่เอาถุงค่ะ (mâi ao thǔng khâ) refuses the plastic bag and is now a normal thing to say.

ห้องน้ำอยู่ไหนคะ

hâwng-náam yùu nǎi khá

Where is the toilet?

Female speaker

The two answers you will hear are อยู่ข้างหลังค่ะ (yùu khâang lǎng khâ, at the back) and อยู่ข้างนอกค่ะ (yùu khâang nâwk khâ, outside). In a shophouse the toilet is often shared with the rest of the building and the key lives at the till, so ask rather than wander off. Carrying tissue is sensible: plenty have a hose and no paper. Men say ห้องน้ำอยู่ไหนครับ (hâwng-náam yùu nǎi khráp).

แยกบิลได้ไหมคะ

yâek bin dâi mǎi khá

Can we split the bill?

Female speaker

Ask before you order, not after, because most shops write one running tab per table and cannot unpick it later. Note the ending: this is a question, so a woman says คะ (khá, high), not ค่ะ. Men say แยกบิลได้ไหมครับ (yâek bin dâi mǎi khráp). Expect ไม่ได้ค่ะ (mâi dâi khâ, not possible) in small shops, which is why หารสองนะครับ (hǎan sǎwng ná khráp, split it two ways) is worth having ready.

เช็คบิลด้วยครับ

chék bin dûay khráp

Could we have the bill, please?

Male speaker

The everyday line, borrowed straight from English. คิดเงินด้วยค่ะ (khít ngoen dûay khâ) and เก็บเงินด้วยครับ (gèp ngoen dûay khráp) are just as common and slightly more Thai. The silent version everyone uses is a raised hand with a small scribbling gesture in the air. In small shops you often pay at the till on the way out rather than at the table, so look for the cash tin before you start waving.

ทั้งหมดเท่าไหร่คะ

tháng-mòt thâo-rài khá

How much is it altogether?

Female speaker

The line for a shop with no printed bill, where the owner adds it up in their head at the tin. ทั้งหมด (tháng-mòt) is altogether. The answer comes back in a fixed frame, ทั้งหมด plus the number plus บาท, so you only have to catch the number. If it goes past you, ask them to write it: เขียนให้หน่อยได้ไหมคะ (khǐan hâi nàwy dâi mǎi khá). Men say ทั้งหมดเท่าไหร่ครับ (tháng-mòt thâo-rài khráp).

สแกนจ่ายได้ไหมครับ

sà-gaen jàai dâi mǎi khráp

Can I pay by scanning the QR code?

Male speaker

PromptPay is how a resident actually pays: a QR code taped to the counter, scanned from a Thai banking app, any amount, no fee. You need a Thai bank account for it. The printed code is often the owner's personal one, so the name on your screen will not match the shop, which is normal. Show them the confirmation screen before you leave, because that slip is the receipt. Women say สแกนจ่ายได้ไหมคะ (sà-gaen jàai dâi mǎi khá).

ขอใบเสร็จด้วยค่ะ

khǎw bai-sèt dûay khâ

Could I have a receipt, please?

Female speaker

ใบเสร็จ (bai-sèt) is the ordinary receipt, and many small shops simply do not issue one. If you invoice or run a company here, what you need is the tax invoice: ขอใบกำกับภาษีด้วยค่ะ (khǎw bai-gam-gàp phaa-sǐi dûay khâ). They will ask for a name, an address and a tax number, so keep all three in your phone. Ask before you pay rather than after the till has closed the sale. Men say ขอใบเสร็จด้วยครับ (khǎw bai-sèt dûay khráp).

รวมค่าบริการหรือยังครับ

ruam khâa baw-rí-gaan rěu yang khráp

Is the service charge already included?

Male speaker

รวม (ruam) is included and หรือยัง (rěu yang) is or not yet. The same shape covers tax: รวมภาษีแล้วหรือยังครับ (ruam phaa-sǐi láew rěu yang khráp, is VAT included?). Two plus signs printed after a menu price mean the ten percent service and seven percent VAT are still to come, so 300 lands at about 353. Street shops, canteens and food courts have neither. Women say รวมค่าบริการหรือยังคะ (ruam khâa baw-rí-gaan rěu yang khá).

วันนี้ผมเลี้ยงเองครับ

wan-níi phǒm líang eeng khráp

Today is on me.

Male speaker

เลี้ยง (líang) is to treat or to feed, and เอง (eeng) is myself. Women drop ผม: วันนี้เลี้ยงเองค่ะ (wan-níi líang eeng khâ). Say it early, ideally to the staff before anyone else reaches for the tab, because the person who invited usually intends to pay for the whole table and a tug of war at the till is uncomfortable for everyone. Whoever suggested the meal is normally the one who pays.

อร่อยมากค่ะ

à-ràwy mâak khâ

That was very good.

Female speaker

Say it to the cook, not only to whoever carried the plate; in a small shop the cook is two metres away behind the wok and will hear you. ฝีมือดีมากค่ะ (fǐi-meu dii mâak khâ, you cook really well) is the stronger version. พรุ่งนี้มาใหม่ค่ะ (phrûng-níi maa mài khâ, I will come again tomorrow) and มากินบ่อยๆค่ะ (maa gin bàwy bàwy khâ, I eat here a lot) turn one meal into being known. Men use ครับ.

กี่คนคะ

gìi khon khá

How many people?

Female speaker

A hearing phrase. This is the first thing said to you at the door, usually by a woman, so it ends in คะ. A man asks กี่คนครับ (gìi khon khráp). Answer with the number plus คน: สองคนครับ (sǎwng khon khráp) or สองคนค่ะ (sǎwng khon khâ). If someone is still coming, add อีกคนกำลังมาครับ or อีกคนกำลังมาค่ะ (ìik khon gam-lang maa khráp or khâ, one more is on the way) so they do not put you at a two-top.

รับอะไรดีคะ

ráp à-rai dii khá

What would you like?

Female speaker

A hearing phrase, and the sentence said to you most often in any shop. ดี here is not good, it is the softening what would be nice for you. Variants: สั่งอะไรดีคะ (sàng à-rai dii khá) and the blunt street version เอาอะไรคะ (ao à-rai khá). Answer with the ขอ plus dish plus number frame, or with เอาอันนี้ครับ (ao an-níi khráp) and a finger. Straight after ordering you get รอสักครู่นะคะ (raw sàk-khrûu ná khá, one moment) or รอสิบนาทีนะคะ (raw sìp naa-thii ná khá, about ten minutes).

กินเผ็ดได้ไหมครับ

gin phèt dâi mǎi khráp

Can you eat spicy food?

Male speaker

A hearing phrase, asked of every foreigner, usually kindly, and it is your one chance to change the dish before it is cooked. Two answers cover it: ได้ครับ แต่เผ็ดน้อยนะครับ (dâi khráp, dtàe phèt náwy ná khráp, yes, but only a little spicy) and กินไม่ได้ครับ ไม่เผ็ดเลยนะครับ (gin mâi dâi khráp, mâi phèt loei ná khráp, no, none at all). Saying just ได้ with a proud smile gets you the full Thai version. A woman asking says กินเผ็ดได้ไหมคะ (gin phèt dâi mǎi khá).

หมดแล้วค่ะ

mòt láew khâ

That is sold out.

Female speaker

A hearing phrase, and two words that strand a learner mid-order. หมด (mòt) is used up, and small shops run out daily, especially after the lunch rush. Recover with แล้วมีอะไรแนะนำแทนไหมครับ (láew mii à-rai náe-nam thaen mǎi khráp, then what would you suggest instead?), where แทน (thaen) is instead. You will also hear วันนี้ไม่มีค่ะ (wan-níi mâi mii khâ, we do not have it today), which means the same thing.

ทานที่ร้านหรือกลับบ้านคะ

thaan thîi ráan rěu glàp bâan khá

Eating in or taking it away?

Female speaker

A hearing phrase, asked at the counter of nearly every shop. ทาน (thaan) is the polite word for eat. Answer ทานที่นี่ครับ (thaan thîi nîi khráp, eating here) or กลับบ้านครับ (glàp bâan khráp, taking it home), with ค่ะ for women. Shorter versions you will also hear are ที่นี่หรือกลับบ้านคะ (thîi nîi rěu glàp bâan khá) and just กลับบ้านไหมคะ (glàp bâan mǎi khá). Get it wrong and your lunch arrives knotted into a bag.

รับอะไรเพิ่มไหมคะ

ráp à-rai phôem mǎi khá

Would you like anything else?

Female speaker

A hearing phrase, and your cue for a second round. Two answers cover everything. To stop: พอแล้วครับ (phaw láew khráp) or พอแล้วค่ะ (phaw láew khâ), that is enough. To keep going: ขอ plus the thing plus เพิ่ม, as in ขอข้าวเพิ่มค่ะ (khǎw khâao phôem khâ, more rice). เพิ่ม (phôem) is the word for one more of something you already have.

เอาเหมือนเดิมอีกรอบครับ

ao měuan-doem ìik râwp khráp

The same again, another round please.

Male speaker

The answer to รับอะไรเพิ่มไหมคะ when the beer is empty and nobody wants to renegotiate. เหมือนเดิม (měuan-doem) means the same as before and works for food as well as drinks. For one bottle only, ขอเบียร์อีกขวดครับ (khǎw bia ìik khùuat khráp), where ขวด (khùuat) is the classifier for bottles. Large bottles are shared into small glasses over ice, so a round means the table, not one person.

ทั้งหมดสองร้อยห้าสิบบาทครับ

tháng-mòt sǎwng ráwy hâa sìp bàat khráp

That is two hundred and fifty baht altogether.

Male speaker

A hearing phrase, often from the owner at a noodle shop or the man on the till. Drill the frame rather than the number: ทั้งหมด, then the amount, then บาท. At the till you then get มีเงินย่อยไหมครับ (mii ngoen-yâwy mǎi khráp, anything smaller?) or ไม่มีทอนค่ะ (mâi mii thawn khâ, I have no change), which is why you carry twenties. ไม่ต้องทอนครับ (mâi dtâwng thawn khráp, keep the change) is not expected, but leaving the coins is normal and remembered.

รับแต่เงินสดค่ะ

ráp dtàe ngoen-sòt khâ

We only take cash.

Female speaker

A hearing phrase, and the one that strands people. Ask before you order: จ่ายบัตรได้ไหมครับ (jàai bàt dâi mǎi khráp) or จ่ายบัตรได้ไหมคะ (jàai bàt dâi mǎi khá, can I pay by card?). Most small shops are cash or a PromptPay QR code, so if you bank in Thailand the scan question is the one to have ready. Carry small notes: a shop at eight in the morning often cannot break a thousand.

หารสองนะครับ

hǎan sǎwng ná khráp

Split it two ways, please.

Male speaker

Say this when the total is read out and the shop cannot print two bills. หาร (hǎan) is the arithmetic verb to divide, and หารสาม (hǎan sǎam) splits three ways. Among friends you will hear คนละครึ่ง (khon-lá khrêung, half each) and คนละเท่ากัน (khon-lá thâo gan, the same each). Splitting is normal between peers and colleagues of a similar age, and awkward when someone clearly senior invited you, in which case let them pay and say ครั้งหน้าผมเลี้ยงนะครับ (khráng nâa phǒm líang ná khráp, next time is on me).

ครั้งหน้าผมเลี้ยงนะครับ

khráng nâa phǒm líang ná khráp

Next time I will treat you.

Male speaker

The move that lets you accept a meal without arguing at the till and without anyone losing face. You are not refusing, you are booking the next one, and that is exactly how it is heard. Add ขอบคุณสำหรับมื้อนี้ครับ (khàwp-khun sǎm-ràp méu níi khráp, thank you for this meal), where มื้อ (méu) is a meal as in lunch or dinner. Women say ครั้งหน้าเลี้ยงนะคะ (khráng nâa líang ná khá). Then actually do it.

เหมือนเดิมใช่ไหมคะ

měuan-doem châi mǎi khá

The usual, is that right?

Female speaker

A hearing phrase, and the moment you have arrived in a neighbourhood: the shop orders for you before you speak. Answer ใช่ค่ะ (châi khâ) or ใช่ครับ (châi khráp), or change it with วันนี้เอาอันนี้ครับ (wan-níi ao an-níi khráp, today I will have this one). Your side of the same words is เอาเหมือนเดิมครับ (ao měuan-doem khráp, the usual). Getting to this at three shops near your building does more for daily life here than any other Thai you learn.

พูดช้าลงหน่อยได้ไหมครับ

phûut cháa long nàwy dâi mǎi khráp

Could you speak a bit more slowly?

Male speaker

Better than nodding through a total you did not catch. ช้าลง (cháa long) is more slowly, and หน่อย keeps it friendly. For a straight repeat, อีกทีครับ (ìik thii khráp, once more). If it is a number that beat you, ask them to write it: เขียนให้หน่อยได้ไหมครับ (khǐan hâi nàwy dâi mǎi khráp). Most shops have a pen and a notepad within reach, and this ends the guessing in one move.

อันนี้ไม่ได้สั่งค่ะ

an-níi mâi dâi sàng khâ

We did not order this one.

Female speaker

Point at the dish, smile, and say it once. ไม่ได้ plus a verb is the standard did not do it, so ไม่ได้สั่ง is did not order. Nothing more is needed and nothing more helps: raising your voice makes the staff lose face in front of the room and slows everything down. Men say อันนี้ไม่ได้สั่งครับ (an-níi mâi dâi sàng khráp). If it turns out you did order it, ขอโทษครับ (khǎw thôot khráp) closes it cleanly.

อาหารยังไม่มาเลยค่ะ

aa-hǎan yang mâi maa loei khâ

Our food still has not come.

Female speaker

ยัง (yang) is still and เลย (loei) at the end means at all, which is what makes this a nudge rather than an accusation. Follow it with อีกนานไหมคะ (ìik naan mǎi khá, will it be much longer?). Dishes in Thailand arrive as they are cooked, not together, so one plate landing alone is normal and not a mistake. Men say อาหารยังไม่มาเลยครับ (aa-hǎan yang mâi maa loei khráp). If a whole order vanished you get ขอโทษค่ะ (khǎw thôot khâ) and it is fired again.

ตรงนี้คืออะไรคะ

dtrong níi kheu à-rai khá

What is this one here?

Female speaker

Put your finger on the line and ask what it is, not whether you were overcharged. ตรงนี้คิดยังไงคะ (dtrong níi khít yang-ngai khá, how is this one worked out?) does the same job, and ช่วยคิดใหม่อีกทีได้ไหมคะ (chûay khít mài ìik thii dâi mǎi khá, could you add it up again?) asks for the recount. ขอดูบิลอีกทีค่ะ (khǎw duu bin ìik thii khâ) gets the paper back in your hands. Handwritten tabs are normal and the mistakes on them are usually genuine, so keep the word เกิน (goen, over) out of it until a recount says otherwise.

อันนี้เผ็ดเกินไปค่ะ

an-níi phèt goen-bpai khâ

This one is too spicy for me.

Female speaker

Do not send it back, that is not really done. Ask for what actually fixes it: ขอข้าวเปล่าเพิ่มค่ะ (khǎw khâao-bplàao phôem khâ, more plain rice), or something with milk in it, ขอนมเย็นแก้วนึงค่ะ (khǎw nom yen gâew nèung khâ, a glass of iced milk). Rice absorbs the chilli and milk and sugar cut it, while plain water only moves it around your mouth. Next time say เผ็ดน้อยค่ะ (phèt náwy khâ) when ordering, or ไม่ใส่พริกค่ะ (mâi sài phrík khâ) if you mean none at all.